Over-Giving

Over-Giving: New Year, New Life Series Opposites attract, as the old saying goes.  European Society of Human Genetics has even found scientific evidence as to why this occurs.  Apparently, if we’re in our child-bearing years, we look for partners who are different from us to expand the genetic building blocks for the benefit of our[…]

The Wisdom of Separating Fact from Story

I know that a lot of people (including my divorce clients and me), have to be careful about the stories we tell ourselves.  These stories either supplement, or reduce, our own personal power.  They are the basis of our happiness or they scuttle it. Let’s look at an example.  You and your three best friends[…]

To Spank or Not to Spank

TO SPANK or NOT TO SPANK Research and Thoughts About Corporal Punishment as Discipline As a kid, were you ever spanked, slapped or swatted as a form of discipline?  Did you get the belt when Dad came home?  Was your mouth ever washed out with soap?  Were you whipped with a switch?  If you were,[…]

Personal Growth & Conscious Relationships

Personal Growth The path of personal growth can be painful at times. The ancient Greek dramatist, Aeschylus, describes it as “wisdom through the awful grace of God.” I would modify this quote slightly for my own purposes to say “wisdom hard won through the awful grace of committed personal growth.” Commitment to one’s personal growth[…]

The Surprising Purpose of Anger

ANGER! Everyone feels it from time to time.  For some, it seems to be an ever-present emotion, which, even once venting has occurred, does not relent or even recede. Where does anger come from and why can it linger? The dictionary defines anger as “a strong feeling of displeasure and belligerence aroused by a wrong;[…]

Why We Stay

What do dog trainers, psychologists, casino owners, and parents of toddlers have in common? They are all familiar with the concept of intermittent reinforcement. Intermittent reinforcement occurs when rewards, rules or personal boundaries are given out, or enforced, sporadically.  This encourages the animal, the child or the other adult to keep pushing until they get[…]

Using the Golden Rule for a Wise Divorce

My recent Facebook post featuring a quote by Catherine Ponder raised a few eyebrows and even drew an expletive as a comment!  If you missed it, here’s the quote: “If you have to force someone or something into your life, that is not part of your good.  What you have to fight to get, you[…]