The Wisdom of Separating Fact from Story

I know that a lot of people (including my divorce clients and me), have to be careful about the stories we tell ourselves.  These stories either supplement, or reduce, our own personal power.  They are the basis of our happiness or they scuttle it. Let’s look at an example.  You and your three best friends[…]

Personal Growth & Conscious Relationships

Personal Growth The path of personal growth can be painful at times. The ancient Greek dramatist, Aeschylus, describes it as “wisdom through the awful grace of God.” I would modify this quote slightly for my own purposes to say “wisdom hard won through the awful grace of committed personal growth.” Commitment to one’s personal growth[…]

Love the Life You Have

Did you end up someplace you never anticipated? Maybe you were divorced after more than 20 years of marriage or are unexpectedly childless? Perhaps you are moving and living someplace totally unanticipated or discovering a new career after decades doing something else?  Are you finding yourself at mid-life with many of your dreams yet unrealized?[…]

Your Abundant Life

It’s the time of year when it is easy to become overwhelmed with expectations, scarcity, and the demands of the season: gifts, food, and decorations. My brother Joe always gives the kids awesome (and expensive!) gifts. Will my kids even notice the presents I give? Did I buy enough food? I probably need more crescent[…]

Dealing with Disappointment in Divorce

If you are getting divorced, you are familiar with disappointment.  You might be disappointed in your spouse.  You might be disappointed in the process.  Or you might be disappointed in yourself. If you didn’t want the divorce, it’s going to be thrust upon you.  If you did want the divorce, it won’t come as quickly[…]

Divorce: Forgive For Your Own Good

When my clients ask me about what I would recommend for “required reading” during their divorce, I always mention Dr. Fred Luskin’s book, “Forgive for Good, A Proven Prescription for Health and Happiness.” Dr. Luskin is the co-founder and the director of the Stanford University Forgiveness Project, and conducts an ongoing series of workshops and[…]

Are You Headed For Divorce?

Not everyone who comes into my office is destined for divorce. In fact, many people make an initial consultation to learn more about the process so that they can decide between whether to divorce or to stay in the marriage. What I’ve learned over the years is that most people don’t understand what makes a marriage[…]